Wednesday, December 05, 2007

Dear Diary

Credit has to go to my sister for giving me this idea. Most little girls keep a diary. I was no exception - I got my first diary on December 26, 1982 (I was 11).

A while back, I read it out loud to my husband who couldn't stop laughing. There seems to be a certain theme ... judge for yourself.

Cover: If anyone finds this please return it as soon as possible without reading the book!

Oct 27, 1983: ..."I got sort of a crush on Mark but I won't admit it to anyone. I'm not over Steve yet..."

Oct 28, 1983: "I love Mark and Steve both and I probably will never get over Steve but Mark's taking his place."

Oct 29, 1985: "Dani used to like a fellow named Barry but unfortunately, I think I am making him think that I like him! Gross!!"

Jan 2, 1986: "I am in love. Not an infatuation or a brief crush but goodness to truly love.... with Barry. Anyway, I have Barry's phone number and we called him up and said "Merry Christmas" and hung up. I called him again and this is how our conversations went:

"Hello Barry?"
"Speaking" or something like that
"We want to apologize for the other phone calls."
"Who are you?"
"Well, if you don't know that then you're retarded."

I can't remember in detail how it went but it was major thrilling to me."

May 23, 1986: "I like Raymond again!"

Aug 27, 1987: "I feel so exhilerated! On the way home, I held Andrew's hand...I'll remember it forever!"

Nov 2, 1987: "After I broke up with Andrew, I felt really depressed. I don't think I'll forget him really but it's hard to look back right now. The break up is too new. But not new enough to stop me from finding a new boyfriend. His name is James."

Feb 5, 1988: "One Tues. Feb 2 (what would have been our third month anniversary), James and I broke up."

Feb 26, 1988: "Today I took the bus home. I was sitting at the back ... when this guy comes and sits next to me. [ed. a conversation ensues]. Wow! I think I'm in love!"

~~~. ~~~.
*cough*

Err. Yeah.
I judiciously omitted the REALLY embarassing entries. What's also amazing is that I managed to maintain an A+ average.

Anyways. I throw my husband under the bus a lot. I thought it was only fair to see what the view looks like from there...

It's PRETTY FREAKING CRAPPY!

5 comments:

  1. *drives over in the bus* This is awesome! That James guy sounds like a real douche!

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  2. More diary entries!!

    Ah, yes, the thrill of holding a guy's hand for the first time... and the first kiss... and the first corruption.... Oh, wait, you didn't have that one listed.

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  3. You're not driving the bus. Puhhhhlese!

    At best, you're a passenger who's getting off at the next stop.

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  4. Think of the wasteland of discarded adolescent boys in Toki's past, crushed by her fleeting interest and indifference!

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  5. Barry B being retarded is a classic. You went through boys like I go through socks!

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